Japanese culture and customs are rooted in a rich history as an island nation with a feudal ancestry and a challenging geography. For many westerners, a homestay in Japan can be a bit of a culture shock. But the differences in culture are what makes the experience enriching and memorable.
Negotiating a Winning Arrival at the Home of Your New International Friends
Japanese people don’t normally shake hands. They bow in greeting and farewell. However, Japanese hosts are eager to please and will often extend a hand to western guests. The savvy visitor who bows to the host might find herself in the position of alternately bowing and shaking hands and bowing--an awkward but positive clash of cultures.
One custom that is non-negotiable is the removal of outdoor shoes before entering a Japanese home. The host family will generally offer a pair of slippers. If guests brings their own, even better, as sizes can be a problem. However, most Japanese families have no problem if the guest wishes to walk stocking-footed or even barefooted inside the home.
Gift giving practices are an important component of Japanese life. When planning a trip overseas, purchase a few simple gifts for members of the host family. A note of caution: it is customary in Japan to return the favor by giving the guest gifts of perceived equal value. One overeager Wisconsin couple showered the host family with t-shirts, wine, candy and other items; they received back an unexpectedly large number of gifts which was awkward for them when it came time to repack. When purchasing host gifts, think in terms of moderation. Small tokens of appreciation are all that are necessary.
Experiencing Asian Meals and Cuisine
While some Japanese have adopted western-style tables and chairs, many still use low tables and floor cushions for family dining. Be prepared to sit on the floor--wear comfortable, roomy clothes.
Chopsticks (hashi) are the main implement for eating. Practice before traveling, but don’t be shy about your inexperience. Keep a good sense of humor, and bring the rice bowl close to your mouth to scoop. Note: set the chopsticks across a plate or bowl when not in use, never stick them into the food.
Inexperienced travelers or those who have not develped wide ranging tastes, may find Japanese cuisine to be very different from what they are used to. Be adventurous, but don’t be afraid to say no thank you. Guests will delight their hosts by trying new things, but they understand that everyone has different tastes.
Navigating Japanese Amenities
Public restrooms, such as in airports and train stations, often have the older squat toilets; however, there is usually one western-style toilet available. Toilets in Japanese homes are always western-style, but they often have a lot more electronic gadgetry (seat warmers, cleansing sprays, etc.) Don’t be intimidated by all the buttons labeled in Japanese script. Simply look on the side of the toilet for the flushing handle. Instead of a sink, there may be a small spigot on top of the tank; this can be used this to rinse hands.
Some Japanese families still sleep on futons laid directly on the floor. These can be surprisingly comfortable. The major difficulty for some people is getting up off the mat after a night of sleep. If this will be a problem, ask about sleeping accomodations before committing to the homestay.
Overcoming Language Barriers
The biggest barrier to a successful homestay in any country can be language. While many Japanese have studied English, some are embarrassed to use it, for fear of speaking poorly. Smiling goes a long way toward making an awkward situation feel comfortable. Here are a couple of simple phrases to get you through the day:
- Ohayoo – Good morning
- Arigato – Thank you
- Mizu o kudasai – water, please
- Jusuu – Juice
- Koohii – coffee
- Ocha – tea
- Biiru – Beer
- Suki desu (pronounced: sookee dess) – I like it
- Kekkoo desu – it’s good, it’s fine
Homestays abroad can bridge cultural divides and improve international relations. A sense of adventure and a sense of humor will go a long way toward making your stay in a Japanese home a memorable one.
To read more about planning a successful trip to Japan read Visiting Japan? What to Know! To read about self-study programs to learn Japanese language try Japanese Language Learning Programs .
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